


So Easily Fall Apart

by 27summer



Category: Amar a Muerte (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-19
Updated: 2019-09-19
Packaged: 2020-10-21 20:02:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,948
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20699081
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/27summer/pseuds/27summer
Summary: Set a couple years after the flash forward in the finale. Valentina and Juliana have been busy and discover how easily their relationship can have problems.





	So Easily Fall Apart

Standing up from the couch, Valentina stretched and put a hand on her back. This couch had seemed comfortable when she and Juliana had bought it but it clearly wasn’t meant for sleeping on it every night for two weeks.

Valentina sighed. It had been two weeks since Juliana had asked for space and she was starting to get worried. They had been together for so long. Valentina couldn’t imagine not being with her.

Running a hand through her hair, Valentina tried not to let her mind go there. They were just having a tough time. They were just so busy between Juliana’s new line and her own responsibilities with Grupo Carvajal. They kept missing each other. They just needed time together. And sure, that didn’t make sense with Juliana asking for space but Valentina wasn’t going to give up.

Valentina headed to the kitchen, hoping to be finished eating before Juliana was done in the shower. As much as she missed her, Valentina was trying to give Juliana what she wanted. Hopefully, Juliana would realize that all they needed was each other.

“Val, hey.” Juliana walked into the kitchen.

“Hey, I’ll get out of your way,” Valentina said.

“Wait. I- I’m going to be done early tonight. I was hoping we could have dinner and talk.” Juliana looked at her expectantly.

“Yeah, of course. Do you want me to make something?” Valentina asked.

“No, I thought I’d pick something up,” Juliana said.

“Sounds good.”

“I’ll see you tonight.” Juliana smiled. “I’ve got to go.”

“See you.” Valentina waited for Juliana to leave before releasing a squeal. Juliana wanted to talk. That meant things were looking up. They were going to be able to fix things and be good together again.

\------------

Valentina looked at Juliana with anticipation but she couldn’t bring herself to break the silence. It was just so nice to be spending time with her. She didn’t want to risk starting an argument. That was part of the reason Juliana had wanted space. With their busy schedules, they had barely any time with each other and when they did, all they could do was argue. Valentina could see that it was a good idea to take some time away from each other. But it had been so long and she didn’t want to be apart anymore.

“Valentina, I’ve been thinking,” Juliana said, drumming her fingers on the table.

“Yeah?” Valentina smiled, hoping to set Juliana at ease. She was clearly nervous about what she was going to say.

“I- I think we should break up,” Juliana said, staring down at the table.

“What?” Valentina asked, not believing what she just heard.

“I think it’s the right thing to do.”

“No, it’s not,” Valentina said quietly. This couldn’t possibly be happening.

“You know that we were fighting all the time,” Juliana explained, still not looking at her. “I thought spending a few weeks apart would help but- I don’t know, Val. I just think it makes sense.”

“No.” Valentina shook her head furiously. “How could being apart permanently be for the best?”

Juliana sighed. “I’m not saying I want that but I don’t want to argue. I don’t want us to start to hate each other.”

“I could never hate you.” Valentina stared at her, trying to figure out what she was thinking.

“You say that now but you’ve never been around parents that fight.”

“We are not your parents,” Valentina snapped.

“I know that but-”

“You don’t really believe either of us is like your dad.” Valentina shook her head.

“Val, I just can’t- I can’t risk it,” Juliana said softly.

“So you’re just going to cut and run.”

“Val, please. Just talk to me.”

“You don’t want to talk, you’ve already made up your mind.” Valentina tried to control herself. She didn’t want to snap and completely lose it.

“I- I have. I just think it’s best,” Juliana said.

“Fine. Fine.” Valentina pushed away from the table. “You want to break up, we’ll break up.”

“Don’t go. We still need to talk about everything.” Juliana stood up to follow her.

“I- I can’t do this right now.” Valentina held her hands up, knowing that if Juliana came close to her, she would fall apart.

“I’m sorry.” Valentina clenched her jaw. She was so hurt that she didn’t really care if Juliana was sorry. “Can I ask you for one thing?”

“Yes, of course,” Juliana said quickly.

“It’s Mateo’s birthday in a couple weeks and there’s that party for him. Can we wait until after to tell anyone?” Valentina asked. She really didn’t want to deal with having to tell her family. The longer she could put that off, the better.

“Okay. That’s- that’s fine.” Juliana took a few step towards her. “Val-”

“I’ve got to go. I just remembered- I forgot something at work.” Valentina took off before Juliana could say anything else. She was seconds away from losing it and she couldn’t do that in front of Juliana. Not anymore. She had never thought that things would end up like this.

\-------------------

Slowly opening the door to the apartment, Valentina entered carefully. She had spent the last few weeks avoiding Juliana and she no longer could. They were going to Mateo’s party and then their break up would be official. She had been working constantly, spending most nights at the office, dreading this day. She had missed Juliana so much but it would be excruciating to spend time with her without really being with her.

Valentina headed to the bedroom, hoping to get dressed before Juliana got home. She opened the door, only to find Juliana in towel. “Sorry! I thought you were still at work.”

“It’s okay. I- I got off early today,” Juliana said blushing as Valentina’s eyes lingered on her.

“I- I’ve got to get a shower before we go,” Valentina said, forcing her gaze away.

“Right.” Juliana moved out of the way, allowing Valentina to go into the bathroom and flopping against the door. It had been so long since she had been this close to her in so little clothing. All she wanted to do was fall her in and never let go. But she couldn’t. Juliana didn’t want her anymore.

Hurrying through her shower, Valentina mechanically got dressed. It hardly mattered what she wore. She just wanted to get through this with a little pain as possible.

“Val? Can you zip me up?” Juliana asked, hesitantly walking into the room.

“Um, yeah.” Valentina closed her eyes, trying to collect herself. It would be so easy to slip her hand underneath Juliana’s dress and press against every inch of her skin. It was so difficult to resist her. She slid the zipper up and stepped away. “There you go. I’ll be ready to leave in a few minutes.”

“Okay.”

Valentina blew out a breath when she was alone once again. She had no idea how she was going to survive hours of pretending to be with Juliana. It had been her idea, she wasn’t ready to tell her family but it would still be awful. To have everything she wanted but not really have it? She wanted to cry just thinking about it. And after it was over, she would have to move out. She had no idea how she would get through any of it. Because all she wanted was Juliana and she couldn’t have her anymore.

\-----------------------------

Valentina sipped on her soda, wishing she had something stronger. She knew she had to keep herself under control and alcohol would only make it impossible. But it was so hard to be here and watch Juliana with her family. She fit in so seamlessly. It was hard to believe it was really over.

“Hey, you’re awfully quiet tonight. Are you okay?” Juliana came over to her, looking at her seriously.

“Yeah. Just thinking.” Valentina forced a smile, knowing Juliana would see right through her.

“I- I don’t want us to be like this. I wanted- This was supposed to make things better.”

“Better?” Valentina scoffed.

“Val, please,” Juliana whispered.

“Whatever. It’s just hard knowing you don’t love me anymore,” Valentina said. That was what it all came down to. Juliana could make whatever excuses she wanted but that was the end of it. That was why she was looking at apartments tomorrow.

“That’s- I never said that,” Juliana said, taking a step closer.

“You don’t have to spare my feelings,” Valentina said bitterly, shaking her head.

“Look at me.” Juliana pressed a hand to Valentina’s cheek until they were looking each other in the eyes. “I-”

“You two can be lovey-dovey with each other at home. We don’t need to see that.” Eva came up to them and rolled her eyes.

“Not now, Eva.” Valentina wanted to throttle her sister.

“I need to talk to Juliana about her new line.” Eva slid an arm around Juliana’s back and led her away.

Valentina groaned inwardly. It figured that just when she and Juliana were really talking, they would get interrupted. And by Eva, who had finally warmed up to Juliana after all the crap she had put them through. It was enough to make her want to scream.

Walking over to talk to Mateo, Valentina attempted to forget everything. She didn’t want to ruin his birthday. Even if she was completely miserable.

\-----------------

“Come here,” Juliana said, grabbing Valentina’s hand when they entered their apartment.

“What?” Valentina allowed herself to be pulled into the bedroom they hadn’t shared in weeks.

“I need you with me tonight,” Juliana murmured, pressing her lips to Valentina’s.

“Mmm, Juls. What are you doing?” Valentina forced herself to pull away.

“I want you,” Juliana said, pressing her cheek to Valentina’s.

“Why? Why now?” Valentina stared hard at Juliana, trying to figure out what was going on with her.

“Because you think I don’t love you anymore.” Juliana looked up at Valentina as she leaned in, trying to kiss her once more.

“I don’t need you to feel sorry for me.” Valentina jerked away.

“That’s not what I’m doing. You- It broke my heart. It’s-” Juliana wrapped her arms around Valentina’s neck. “I just need you.”

“I don’t want you to regret anything,” Valentina said.

“I won’t. I could never regret being with you.” Juliana stroked behind Valentina’s ear.

“Oh, God.” Valentina kissed her, sinking into Juliana’s embrace. It might be a mistake but she couldn’t resist Juliana. Not when she had her in her arms like she always wanted her.

“Come on.” Juliana led her further into the bedroom.

“I’ve missed you so much.” Valentina trailed kisses down Juliana’s neck as she slid down the zipper of her dress.

“Missed you, too.” Juliana whispered, pulling down the straps of Valentina’s dress. “I need you naked.”

“Need you everywhere.” Valentina shrugged off her own dress while yanking Juliana’s off. “You feel so good.”

“Come here.” Juliana laid back on the bed and smiled up at her.

“Oh, perfect.” Valentina settled on top of her. She needed to remember every second of this. It might be the last time she ever had Juliana like this and she needed to mark every moment in her heart.

\------------

The sun was shining directly into Valentina’s eyes but she didn’t want to move. She had slept better than she had in months and all because she had Juliana in her arms. She tightened her arms, knowing she needed to enjoy these moments before everything blew up again. She wasn’t naïve enough to think that last night changed anything. No matter how much she wanted it to.

“Mmm. What time is it?” Juliana asked, yawning and stretching.

“Early. Go back to sleep.”

“Nice as that sounds, I should get up.” Juliana sat up, looking down at Valentina. “Val-”

“Don’t say it, Juls. Please.” Valentina sat up as well.

“Last was fantastic but it shouldn’t have happened,” Juliana said carefully.

“It wasn’t a mistake,” Valentina said sharply.

“It wasn’t. Being with you could never be a mistake. But it’s only going to make this break up harder,” Juliana said.

“Well, why do we have to break up?” Valentina asked. “I still love you and I think you still love me.”

“I do.” Juliana sighed. “But-”

“But why? Why are you so determined to end this?” Valentina got out of bed, searching her drawers for a shirt to pull on. She couldn’t have this conversation naked.

“It’s for the best,” Juliana said weakly, looking small on the bed.

“For the best?” Valentina snorted. “So what was last night? One last fuck?”

“That’s an awful thing to say.”

“Well, whatever. You broke my heart.” Valentina rolled her eyes.

“I’m sorry.” Juliana stood up, wrapping a sheet around herself.

“I- I don’t care. That doesn’t make me feel better.” Valentina knew she had to leave before she lashed out at Juliana. Despite everything, she didn’t want to hurt her. “I just wish I knew why you don’t want me anymore.”

“You’re what I want,” Juliana said quietly.

“Then why are you doing this?”

Juliana took a few steps until she was right next to Valentina. “We have been fighting so much. And when we don’t fight, it’s because we’re so busy with work we can’t see each other. There’s no time for us to just be together.”

“I- I- If it’s work, I’ll quit. I’ve told you before. I don’t have to be a reporter,” Valentina said quickly.

“No, I’d never ask you to do that.” Juliana shook her head.

“Because you wouldn’t do that for me.” Valentina frowned.

“No, I would. And that’s the problem.” Juliana reached out to take Valentina’s hand in her own. “I dreamed of being a fashion designer my whole life. And now I am and I’m not happy because things are a mess with you.”

“I don’t understand, Juls.”

“I started thinking that I wanted to quit my job and it scared me. This dream I had forever wasn’t enough because of my relationship with you.” Juliana took a hand back to rub her forehead. “I’m not explaining this very well.”

“No, you’re really not.”

“This dream that kept me optimistic during my childhood became unimportant to me. Because all I wanted was you. So I thought that if I took you out of the equation, maybe things would be better.” Juliana ducked her head.

“That makes no sense at all,” Valentina said, staring at Juliana in disbelief.

“I know it sounds stupid but I didn’t want to give up my dream.”

“I would never ask you to,” Valentina repeated, cupping Juliana’s face in her hands. “You know that, right?”

Juliana nodded. “Of course. I’d never ask you to give up your career, either. But I wanted to.”

“Juls, why didn’t you talk to me?” Valentina asked. That was the thing she didn’t understand. She and Juliana always talked about everything.

“Because it wouldn’t go anywhere. You would just convince me we could work it out.”

“Because we can.” Valentina pressed her forehead to Juliana’s. “We can work anything out together.”

“How? I hate fighting with you.” Juliana’s eyes filled with tears. “That’s all we’ve been doing lately.”

“So we stop.” Valentina wiped away Juliana’s tears. “We figure something out.”

“You make it sounds easy. But it’s not.” Juliana pulled back.

“Do you love me?” Valentina asked. That was what it all came down to. If Juliana didn’t love her, then everything was a disaster. But if she did, nothing else mattered.

“Yes. I do. I love you so much.” Juliana threw her arms around Valentina. “I thought I was doing what was right.”

“I know you were. But anything that separates us is not the right thing.” Valentina leaned back so that she could meet Juliana’s eyes. “You’re finished with the designs for you new line, right?”

“Yeah. How’d you know that?”

“I pay attention to everything about you.” Valentina tucked Juliana’s hair behind her ear. “I want us to take the rest of this week off from work.”

“Val, I don’t want you to sacrifice something important.” Juliana tilted her head, leaning into Valentina’s touch.

“Stop. I can miss a few days of work. We need time together.” Valentina smiled, a sense of relief flowing over her. Now that she understood the problem, it felt like she would be able to fix it.

“Fine, we spend time together and then go back to work and everything’s the same again. How does that work?” Juliana asked.

“That’s what we’re going to figure out. We’ll talk about how we can do this. Maybe we’ll start taking a day each week that we’ll both come home early.” Valentina shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t know. But we can figure it out.”

“You’re so certain,” Juliana said. “I wish I could be like you.”

“Maybe that’s why we work. I can make you sure and you can keep me on the ground,” Valentina pointed out. “We’re good for each other.”

“We are,” Juliana rested her head on Valentina’s shoulder.

“Then that settles it. The rest of this week is just for us. And I think we should go back to bed.” Valentina yanked her shirt over her head.

“Okay, okay.” Juliana let the sheet drop from around her. “Love you.”

“Love you,” Valentina said, walking Juliana toward the bed. “I want to be with you all the time.”

“Me, too.” Juliana pushed Valentina back on the bed, crawling on top of her.

“Everything’s going to be fine,” Valentina whispered as Juliana kissed all over her skin. “It’s me and you, Juls. Just the way it should be.”

“Sounds perfect.” Juliana grinned as her hand slipped lower and they stopped talking for the rest of the morning.

**Author's Note:**

> This didn't end up how I wanted it but I thought I'd post it anyway. Thanks for reading.


End file.
